Thursday, October 26, 2006

Compacting

For days I have wanted to say, "forget the compact." I really wanted to go out and shop. I wanted to get new clothes. I had this overwhelming desire/need to change - and I "knew" that a shopping spree would fulfill this.

Well, I am now glad that I did not act upon these intense "needs." Instead of jumping in the car and going shopping at the local mall, I sat down and thought about why I felt like this. It took me a little while, but I recalled that after one child was born I had an intense need to cut my hair. So, I drastically cut my hair from almost waist length to chin length. It did not make me happier - actually I was upset with the choice. I realized that my "need" to shop was realated to post partum issues (no longer pregant, but also not back to prepregnant state), lack of sleep, inability to keep up with the household chores.... It was not about getting more stuff - it was about having too much stuff. Once I realized that my shopping "needs" were tied to other issues, I could let go of the desire to shop.

So, for the past few days I packed away my maternity clothing (and will be passing them onto a pregnant friend) and pulled out my pre-pregnancy clothing. There are many items I cannot yet wear, however, there are a few I can. I have too much anyway. So, once I can start running again (marathons), I know that I will be back into my little clothing and can rid of the rest. It is hard for me to give my body time - I tend toward being a workaholic/overachiever. But I promised myself that I would not start long runs until after Samuel is 6 weeks old.

I am going through, reorganizing and decluttering. It may take babysteps, but I know that once I purge of what I don't love and need I will feel more at ease.

I am certainly happy that I took a little time to look at the root of this desire and came to the realization that I don't need more to make me happy. I just need to make other changes for fulfillment. Of course, 2 weeks postpartum is never a good time to make choices and/or drastic changes! I am compact minded again!

5 comments:

BurdockBoy said...

Well done. I'm happy that you were able to resist the mall. I have also found that reorganizing and getting rid of unneeded things helps my well-being. It's amazing how getting rid of stuff often feels better than buying.

My partner is concerned how her postpartum will go. Hopefully we will handle it well.

Gavrielah said...

That's great that you were able to identify the root of your "need" and deal with the problem itself.

Sally Parrott Ashbrook said...

I am so pleased that you are willing to admit your struggles as well as your triumphs, Miranda. I think it's important to admit how human we are as we go through these processes. I am glad you overcame your urge to purchase, but even if you had slipped up, I think you would've gotten back on track. I do find that when I feel out of sorts, I have the idea that either a) buying or b) eating will make me feel better. If it does, it's temporary comfort.

Carolyn said...

Wow, did this ever bring back memories! My younger "child" is 23, but I can clearly remember going to Merle Norman and spending an obscene amount of money on makeup that I hardly ever used! I do believe these feelings are part of postpartum hormones--in other words, they pass. Congratulations on being able to work all this out and bypass a big mistake!

Emme said...

Carolyn, thanks for sharing your post-partum shopping experience. Now that we are close to 4 weeks post partum, I am feeling much better!